Sitting around the kitchen table at Leana McDougal’s Argyle home with others connected by video chat was a group of moms wishing they had become friends at a party or their children’s school activities.
Instead, they found each other because they had breast cancer. Ranging in age from 39 to 51, they call themselves the “Argyle Breasties.” They formed the group this spring after McDougal posted her story on Facebook.
“You find this is a group nobody wants to be a part of,” said the 45-year-old McDougal, whose only child Barrett turns 10 in November.
“It’s more of a moral support type of thing more than anything else,” added Argyle’s Amy McCarty, 46, who has children ages 14, 15, and 22. “We may be going through things differently and at different stages, but we all understand especially the emotional impact it has on not only us but our kids.”
These women spend their time online and in-person supporting each other through the toughest times of their lives. This includes sharing intimate details and pictures of things not meant for public consumption.
Some found they had the disease through routine monthly self-exams, others from their annual mammograms. Many have the same oncologists and plastic surgeons.
McDougal found her tumor by accident in late January which turned out to be triple negative stage 2 cancer. She did 24 weeks of chemotherapy and had a double mastectomy on Oct. 2 where they found more cancer than anticipated.
“I’m not a typically an anxious person but in that February-March timeframe, I was about to go overboard,” McDougal said.
McCarty’s doctor discovered a lump during a routine check-up in 2021. After a biopsy, she learned she had Stage 1 cancer. Earlier that year her father died of pancreatic cancer and after her diagnosis genetic testing showed she had a mutation. It turns out she was predisposed to have cancer. She had a double mastectomy and reconstruction but no chemotherapy because her cancer was hormone driven. Following a year’s process, she was told she was cancer free.
“It’s almost like a grief process,” McCarty said. “You’re mad, you’re angry, you’re tired, you’re scared. It’s the fear of the unknown.”
Dawn Harden, 51, recently moved to Justin from Argyle where she lived for four years after 19 years in Flower Mound. Genetic testing in 2021 told her she had the cancer gene in her and last December at her annual mammogram a lump was found, tested, and confirmed at stage 2. She completed six rounds of immunotherapy followed reconstruction in June. She also had to have eye surgery to repair closed tear ducts caused by her chemotherapy.
“I’m starting to feel normal,” said Harden, who has two grown children. “My hair is growing back. I’m starting to look and feel more like my old self.”
Argyle’s Michelle Leach, 42, was diagnosed early this year initially at stage 1 but through a biopsy was found to be stage 2. She started chemo drugs and immunotherapy but ran into some side effects that delayed and even stopped some of her treatments. She is scheduled for surgery on Oct. 18.
“Families are resilient. When they see us fighting and the community coming together it’s amazing,” said Leach, a computer scrum master and traveling nurse with children ages 11 and 13.
Leach’s neighbor Corrie Poli, who had a benign tumor removed at age 16, was 38 when she found a lump during a self-exam last year. After a mammogram and biopsy, she learned her fate in January and had a double mastectomy in April.
“I feel lucky I haven’t gone through what these other ladies have,” said Poli, the mother of two teenagers. “I didn’t have radiation. I didn’t have chemo. I had some revision surgeries and have done well since then.
“Don’t tell yourself you have to be 40 to start checking out your boobs. Know your body and not just your boobs. If you think something is wrong, you know better than anybody. Advocate for yourselves.”
Before turning 40 in April, Argyle’s Amy Fannin had what seemed to be grains of white sand thought to be calcium deposits found during a routine mammogram. Her doctor told her she could either wait six months for further investigation or have it looked at immediately. She chose the latter and the biopsy showed stage 1 cancer. She could either have a lumpectomy or the double mastectomy she opted for and so far, it has done the trick.
“I was very fortunate with that roll of the dice that it was not invasive at that point, so I didn’t have to do anything else,” said Fannin, who has five children between ages 9 and 12.
Flower Mound’s Denise Butler, 46, had a normal mammogram last December. By April, she found a lump while in the shower which turned out to be triple negative cancer. She searched Facebook for others like her and found Leach, like her a nurse practitioner. She will have a double mastectomy in November following five months of chemo.
“My message is to do those breast self-exams because if I had waited for eight months this cancer would likely have spread everywhere,” Butler said.
Despite their physical challenges, each of the women has continued to work as much as they physically can.
“You have to keep some normalcy in your life,” McDougal said.
McCarty said the biggest blessing was finding out how many others not only had breast cancer but nearly an identical version and treatment.
“Yes, you have family and friends to rally together. They can sympathize but not empathize,” McCarty said. “When you can show scars with each other, you’re okay.”
The women serve as positive cheerleaders for each other including setting up meal trains for each other.
“You find out who your true friends are when something bad happens,” Harden said. “I don’t know what I’d do without these girls. They are amazing.”
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